Air Date: Week of December 22, 1995
Santa Claus is the subject of this week's almanac.
CURWOOD: According to the Environmental Protection Agency, Santa Claus is not an endangered species. In fact, St. Nick sightings are approaching an all-time high. EPA experts say they aren't sure if this is because Claus hasn't kept up with stealth technology developments, or that children are going to bed later. But Mr. Claus does have some environmental concerns. First on his list is the increasing number of good children. Yes, as Santa himself points out, his nice index is at an all-time high, which has led to a skyrocketing use of wood and petrochemicals. St. Nick has asked his elves to wrap presents in paper made of knaff and rice stalks. He's also making more toys out of recycled plastic. On the plus side, the declining naughty index means a similar decrease in coal distribution. Although the famed Kringle vein is the purest, lowest sulfur coal ever mined -- some people even say it tastes suspiciously like licorice -- both environmental activists and Claus & Company are relieved that less of it will be making its way into the world.
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